Tuesday, September 27, 2022

Far Cry Six -It’s Probably Not Communist

Howdy folks hope you’re all having a good one and welcome to far cry 6, where today we are going to be getting our communist revolutionary on hang on a minute said: everybody in america. What’s this shit? Well, yeah, absolutely that’s what this game is. I mean obviously, ubisoft have bent over backwards to specifically avoid saying communist, because obviously they’d really prefer if this game sold well in the usa, but as long as you’re capable of thinking and breathing. At the same time, the clues are all there they’re, not even that difficult to see. I just think it’s absolutely hilarious. How ubisoft had literally bent over backwards to not say communist at any point throughout the course of this game they are so terrified of the c word anyway.

I’m going to give you a quick, potted history of the game, because the alternative is to sit through 20 minutes to half an hour of what is effectively a minimally interactive, cutscene uh establishing the plot, and instead I can just summarize it for you. In a minute, the caribbean island of yara had basically been run as a capitalist slave plantation up until 1967, when a popular, not communist, okay, a popular revolution toppled the government and brought freedom to the indentured masses. The usa responded by immediately blockading this tiny, definitely not communist caribbean island in the middle of the cold war. The american blockade is still enforced to this day and that’s kind of confusing, because apparently, in the meantime, the island’s dictator and el presidente for life, gus, freem from break and bad, has discovered a cure for cancer. That’s grown on the tobacco plantations on the island, where he has enslaved the population to produce this wonder drug for him and is earning billions financing a massive army by somehow managing to export this cancer cure through the american blockade, yet that they’re a little sketchy on that part. They never quite explained exactly how that works.

I think this is one of those parts in a game or movies logic, where you’re not really supposed to think about it or question it too much. You just nod- and you know, move along as the game begins. El presidente’s slave labor force has well mostly died. Thanks to all the toxic chemicals they’re forced to work with so he’s on another recruiting drive el presidente sends his jack-booted thugs into the capital city to round up all of the unemployed, at least one of which, while he may be far too young to die, is absolutely far too stupid to live. Yeah alejo attacked a tank with a beer bottle, I’m fairly sure the revolution will manage without him anyway. I’ll cut a very long story, short you’re, trying to get out to a boat, run the blockade and get to america, and now that alejo’s ticket is free, you convince the boat owner to take some random kid, along with you.

Instead, the random kid, however, turns out to be the son of el presidente to his credit. The kid wants absolutely nothing to do with his murdering shithead of her father, but his murdering shit out of her father is wise to the kids tricks intercepts. The boat takes his son back, kills everybody on board, except for you and that’s where the actual game starts. Naturally, the first thing you’re gonna need is a weapon, and the game very conveniently gives you one right on the beach where you got washed up shit. What the game does not do, however, is give you any ammunition for the weapon, because hell even ubisoft have a sense of humor by some miracle. Your phone is still working and on your phone, you have a photograph of the map that your friend lita provided, showing the way to the revolutionary camp here on the island, and it’s here where a couple of far cry: 6’s, gameplay convention start to get established.

You see the blue signs on the rocks. These are rebel codes, indicating lookout, points, camps, safe houses, equipment, stashes, all kinds of good revolutionary things. I’m not entirely sure why el presidente’s forces haven’t been able to figure out the code or, at the very least, follow them, but well, you know because of gang reasons very early on like as soon as you leave the beach better stay quiet you get introduced to the concept of stealth kills and I do have to say they are very well, dare I say executed. I don’t know why I’m laughing that wasn’t funny at all, but they are very, very well executed here in far cry 6.. This isn’t the first time the game tells you to sneak up behind somebody and press a certain key for an instant takedown, but holy shit, they’re brutal! That’s why you died.

Now, I’m going to call this you you’re going to. I am actually starting to figure out why el presidente’s troops haven’t been able to figure out the blindingly obvious rebel codes. It’s because they’re all deaf blind and terminally stupid. I mean how did these guys not hear that it only barely qualifies as a stealth kill, yeah whatever well having disposed of a couple of el presidentes jack-booted bully boys and girls, who were far too stupid to live? We make our way to the commie camp, where of course, we have to have the obligatory establishing dominance session by getting into an immediate dick waving contest with the leader of the communist revolutionaries, which is kind of amusing, because they’re both women gonna show your face before you shoot me, I’m danny a friend of lita. You are the only survivor, and it’s at this point where you realize far cry. 6 is suffering a bit of an identity crisis and seems to think it’s borderlands answer me.

I said: are you the only survivor see lucky? They don’t know their risks? That’s all you have to say you’re here. That’s what matters! Just a second hermana, I’m getting the hell out of yara well you’re in my camp. I need a place to stay a few days. Libertas, no charity, hermana lita, said you’d help. Lita also said you weren’t a pussy. Come here you’re an orphan, see, funny how friends can be closer than family.

Remember, danny castillo has kept you an orphan. Why do you want to run? I watched castillo order, a whole boat of our people shot to death, get as far away as you can from that psychopath. All of you when tyranny is law revolution is order. Quoting bolivar won’t save you. It’s pedro albiso gonna save yara with library cards. I have a list free elections, free expression, free the outcasts, ayat free of castillos, simple, simple castillo’s got what 300 000 troops.

I count six burnt out geria’s and you with a bullet to the leg. You don’t believe me I’ll show you we launched an attack from our base to this island was a basic operation here: viviro tobacco plantation, snatched, some fuel and go home, but castillo’s forces were waiting, got us down from 60 to 6.. You need to get back to your base. Yes, but this island is surrounded by a blockade. We don’t have boats, we don’t have much gear and we are not leaving until that.

Viviro plantation goes up in smoke, but we are guerrillas. We know this land inside out you’re already familiar with argeria paths. They were built by the legends in 67 they’re spread like a web across all of yara. Now they’re, ours, guerrilla pastor, go to ambush soldados or to hide. If the army is on your back, they have caches that will help you survive, and all of this is legit. This map is old as hell made for tourists yeah it’s out of date, but you got the regions, municipalities and landmarks of yara you’ll get used to it.

Now I need to call in some favors with the locals to get us a boat, and you need to go find me juan cortes who someone who can make one guerrilla fight. Like a thousand, you know, I’m not a getty here right I’ll, give you food a bed, even a goddamn boat, to sail to the yankees, but it’s gonna cost you bullets and blood. You can shoot so shoot so we’re gonna have to work for our ticket to miami, and that means finding juan for clara. That looks like a one and one’s totally, not a communist honest. Today we drink drinking the worst fucking cantina in yara or is in colombia, and the game still thinks it’s portland leave the bottle. Let’s work for you, another guapo, you listen rule 16! A guerrillas revolution never ends always another war, another cantina, another ugly, bartender juan cortes.

What do you think gave it away still not borderlands? This is in a fucking soul me to find you see I learned long ago, never to doubt her, you will too hey. I know you don’t think so yeah. I know you it’s like I’m looking at a mirror. What are you talking about those eyes? You got a taste, you convince yourself you’re a hero, but you wake up at junkie, just like juan cortes. This is a fucking waste of time. Can you whistle what nah you can’t whistle you fucking rat the world’s more dead anyway? What the fuck say what boy is in love with you and I ruined the only copy of my book.

Once again, we have outstayed our welcome so no doubt attracted by the gunfire and horrific screams of a man having his leg torn off by a baby crocodile. The army turns up, and after a brief and if I’m being honest here fairly satisfying gunfight, the gun play in far cry. 6 does feel pretty good and I like that they gave you an fm foul as your first weapon on the strong right arm of the free world, because this was actually the first rifle I ever trained, but moderately short story even shorter, instead of heading straight back to clara’s camp. While instead gives you a job to go and steal some shit for it see that smoke. That means the watchtower just got a supply drop with some of the rarest materials you’ll find in yara, and you are going to go get it now. You want me to steal shit for you, gunpowder and supremo bond, the cerveza and chaser of resolve.

I’m gonna teach you to make shit for weapons because making shit for weapons is cool and it’s rule number nine always use the right tool for the right job you coming with me, fuck! No, you got guapo, you can tear shit up with him, but if you want to be sneaky, leave him behind that cutie loves to make a mess. Okay. So now it’s time to put together everything that you’ve learned so far, weapon or not military will shoot me on site here. Well, I say everything that we’ve learned so far, but at this point the game has not actually told me that I can stay hidden in tall grass, or you know, flowers and stuff like this, which is really weird, because this is not my first far cry rodeo. So I’m expecting that I can stay hidden in tall vegetation like this and every other far cry game has gone over its way. To tell me that I can stay hidden in tall vegetation like this, but I’m really just kind of hoping, because that’s something that far cry 6 up until this point hasn’t actually done it right.

To read more : https://www.youtube.com/c/BohemianEagle

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